For those of you who are afflicted by this debilitating condition, don’t despair – it’s actually quite common amongst and almost exclusive to the male and female writing fraternity.
The good news? Pre Submission Mania, along with another condition common in writers, Whine Flu, do have temporary remedial alternatives to finding an agent and a publishing deal. Although to be fair, it is only either or both of these options that have been proven to provide an actual cure... There are encouraging alternatives available which provide immense symptom relief during the manic fear phase of PSM. The trick? To encourage the writer to think of anything else other than actually submitting their manuscript. I personally have self medicated during the height of acute symptoms by:
- Taking a long evening walk, followed by Sky plus recordings of Judge Judy accompanied by alcohol.
- Facebook stalking, not scary stalking, just watching what others are up to.
- Positive mantras e.g. ‘Marion Keyes, Who IS she? Marion Keyes, Who Is she? repeated in the mirror.
- Chocolate.
- Lines. You know the punishing school type ones? My favourite is, “I must not whinge, ‘But I want to be PUBLISHED’ to my husband anymore.” This particular one does only provide relief to Whine Flu symptoms and I’ve found it’s a lot quicker to type it out, rather than write it longhand?
- Ebay (It’s amazing what people sell) Write words and other writerly sites.
- Buying the envelopes and folders for the submissions, then staring at them with my hands over my ears singing, ‘La, La, La, La…..La, La, La, La’
- Googling Johnny Depp to see if he’s still married to that French woman.
- Burying my copy of The Writers and Artists Yearbook in the garden whilst eating maltesers.
- Washing, ironing, cleaning, recycling. You get the gist.
9 comments:
Pure genius! Brilliant, brilliant post!
Hi Fionnuala
If your novel is half as witty as your posts surely they'll be biting your hand off for it.
Who IS Marion Keyes, anyway?
S x
Hope you're soon recovering from the PSM Fionnuala! Only one remedy, though - submit! Just do it! (I know - even the word submit sounds like you're going to die, doesn't it!). And then, of course, after that we all suffer from another PSM ... post submission mania ... which could be even harder ...
We ought to form a support group:)
Great post!
Thanks guys! And Olivia...Sssssh. The 'post' submission mania was to be a follow up!
Excellent post as always! I like Whine Flu - you can whine and moan as much as you like but you don't have the sore throat, runny nose, or hacking cough!
Yes, husbands are there to be whined at! That's their job. They don't realise how big a part they play in the creative process do they?
Julie xx
Love this post! Whine Flu is great! I'd swap it with swine flu any day!
:)
Love it!
Who IS she? WHO IS SHE?!!?
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